March 2001: The Bush administration overturns a Clinton-era regulation reducing the amount of arsenic in drinking water.
April 2001: Bush signs a $1.65 trillion tax cut for large corporations and the wealthy.
August 2001: The "Osama Bin Laden determined to strike U.S." memo reaches the president's desk; He's clearing brush at his Crawford, Texas, ranch on a month-long vacation.
Sept. 11, 2001: President Bush reads "My Pet Goat" after being told of the attacks on the United States. Dick Cheney is already hiding underground since September 10.
October 2001; Bush signs Patriot Act. All US laws since 1776 don’t mean diddly now.
January 2002: "Gitmo" grand opening party. Dress of the day is orange jump suit.
May 2002: Bush issues executive order authorizing the National Security Agency to wiretap phones and read e-mails of U.S. citizens. Sexy phone calls and e-mails are routed to George to review.
June 2002: In a speech at West Point, Bush reveals his "Bush Doctrine" of preemptive war; behind the scenes, administrations officials plan the Iraq war. On TV they declare Saddam has WMDs, “nookoolar” material, is hosting Al-Qaeda conventions and can destroy the US in 40 minutes.
September 2002: One year after 9/11, Bush asks Congress for authorization of military force against Iraq. They grant it with no questions asked and no debate.
February 2003: Secretary of State Colin Powell states his case for war with Iraq at the UN. Most of the world, except the US Congress, feels it was a totally fabricated presentation. In the future Powell will admit it was.
March 19, 2003: - Bush declares war on Iraq because Saddam Husein is trying to destroy the US with WMDs. The first US military action is to protect the oil fields.
April 2003: Congress approves $79 million for the Iraq war; the next month, Bush signs $350 billion tax cut for the wealthiest of Americans. Those opposed to the war are labeled “Unpatriotic”.
May 1, 2003: President Bush declares mission accomplished in Iraq while aboard the deck of the USS Abraham Lincoln. The Iraq war is over!
June 2003: FCC pushes for more media consolidation, allowing one company to own newspapers, TV and radio stations in the same city in order for the very wealthy to brainwash Americans.
July 2003: Cowboy Bush tells the Iraq insurgents to: "Bring 'em on." They do. Nearly 300 U.S. soldiers die over the next six months.
August 2003: Bush signs a budget that essentially kills the Teach for America program for inner-city schools. The dumbing down of Americans begins in earnest.
November 2003: U.S. soldiers' death toll in Iraq reaches 437. “Bring ‘em on!”
March 25, 2004: Bush cracks jokes about weapons of mass destruction at the 2004 Correspondent's Dinner.
“Those weapons of mass destruction must be somewhere," quipped the White House wagster. "Nope, no weapons over there Maybe under here."
April 2004: Abu Ghraib photos leaked. Military privates are blamed. The US does not torture…does not torture…does not torture…
July 2004: In his 2005 budget, Bush freezes the amount of Pell Grants for the third straight year. After his budget passes, average Pell Grant awards decrease for the first time in six years. Changes in eligibility cut thousands of students from grant rolls. We need more Walmart workers, not scientists, after all.
September 2004: The federal deficit reaches a record high. American troop deaths in Iraq now top 1,000. Also: Assault weapons ban lifted.
November 2004: Democrats, and former Naderites, gather at bars across the country to watch election results; hopes dashed again; Bush declares the close election a "mandate." Voting machines are not rigged…not rigged…not rigged…
July 2005: Bush appoints conservative John Roberts to Supreme Court; three months later, he appoints conservative Samuel Alito. The fix is in. Immunity for Bush crimes guaranteed.
August 2005: While President Bush is on vacation, Hurricane Katrina barrels down on New Orleans. Over the next two days, he travels the country for photo-ops (with John McCain and a country music star) before sending federal aid. Bush “is not racist” Laura declares.
April 2006: News reports reveal Bush has issued "signing statements" for more than 750 laws, stating he has the power to override the laws if they conflict with his interpretation of the Constitution. Bush is a constitutional scholar – NOT!
October 2006: Bush signs the John Warner National Defense Authorization Act, which allows the president to deploy U.S. military troops to police American streets in the event of a "national emergency." Martial law is now a reality. Bush has dictatorial powers.
May 2007: Bush signs a presidential directive that places him in control of all three branches of government in case of an extraordinary disaster. However, he has no power over the fourth branch: Dick Cheney.
June 2007: For a third time, Bush vetoes federal funding for stem cell research. God will cure cancer and other incurable diseases.
March 2008: Bush has taken 879 days of vacation in his eight years of office, approximately one-third of his presidency; five years into the Iraq War, over 4,000 U.S. troops dead; estimates of Iraqi civilian deaths range from 88,000 to over half a million. Mission accomplished. Bring ‘em on!
September 2008: Bush's approval ratings lowest in his presidency as he presides over the worst financial crisis since the Depression. Again, mission accomplished!