Saturday, May 21, 2011

If You’re Reading This, You’re In Heaven!

~








Welcome to the official newsletter of Heaven!

Yes, the Rapture happened, and you won! You’re in Paradise! (Sorry it’s exactly like the world you left behind; perhaps you should appreciate the world you left behind a little more!)

We are too a-scared to wait up until whenever the rapture is supposed to hit California and suck 89-year-old Oakland-based doomsday predictor Harold Camping back to his watery grave, so we’ll just schedule this post to publish in the morning.

But we have grabbed some news bits from New Zealand, which apparently has yet to be destroyed by Jeebus Quakes even though it’s well after 6 p.m. local time.







~

4 comments:

jadedj said...

Oh, Harold, Harold, Harold...ye let us down...again.

Chimp said...

Hey, it's not 6 pm yet. Maybe the whole thing starts here and New Zealand is last!!! After all, New Zealand has always been first on New Year's Day!!

jadedj said...

I hate to bust that bubble, but it is tomorrow in New Zealand. Harold is now 0 - 2...or is this 3?

Chimp said...

I'm going back to bed in my bomb shelter. G'nite!