Humor by Chimpplanet
This has been an eventful year in the news.
After hiding out for about 8 months, in order to evade an arrest warrant for crimes against humanity, issued by the International Criminal Court, George W. Bush has finally been found hiding out in the Pakistani mountains with his old buddy, Osama bin Laden.
He has already been tried in absentia and found guilty of multiple crimes and for causing the Iraqi Holocaust and will be hanged once his appeals run out.
Former VP Dick Cheney who has gone through his 5th heart transplant and who has shot three more of his buddies in hunting “accidents” and who has told President Obama to “f*ck off” for the tenth time, decided to volunteer for the US Army in order to make up for draft dodging during the Vietnam War. The Army might take him up on the offer and use him as a bayonet dummy during basic training.
Donald Rumsfeld, extremely depressed in not being able to get buses to stop and pick him up during his commute in Washington DC, died of an overdose of drugs. Not officially verified yet, but rumors are that he ingested a bucket full of aspartame and injected himself with large quantities of Tamiflu, his bird flu pandemic vaccine.
Condi Rice has gone through her third wife while teaching at Stanford. She had two children in her last two marriages with Randy Bean and Dick Cheney’s daughter Mary Cheney, who had divorced her first wife. She also had the tenth oil tanker named after her by a Saudi Arabian firm.
It was a “shocking” day when Alberto Gonzales, George Bush’s personal lawyer, was found tied to a cross with a black hood covering his body and attached to live electric wires.
The newly re-elected President Obama has undone about 20% of the unconstitutional laws passed during the 8 years of “George Bush’s Dictatorship” as the time is now called since it was proven in court that both of his elections were stolen.
(More PLANET OF THE CHIMPS here)