Tuesday, April 24, 2012

USA HEADLINES FROM APRIL 24, 2030

...





US President Jacob Manuel Obama Bush says he will run for second term in 2032






Ozone created by electric cars now killing millions.

White minorities still trying to have English recognised as America's third language.

Children from two-parent, married, heterosexual families bullied in schools for being 'different'. Tolerance urged.

American Government has told the people that Squirrels, cats and dogs taste like chicken.

Wall Street banks merge to form new super bank, Goldman Rothschild BinLaden Epstein Bush Cheney: Huge bonuses paid to executives to celebrate launch.

Baby conceived naturally! Scientists stumped.

Iran still quarantined after Israeli nuclear attack that killed most of the population and radiated most of the Middle East and much of the world.

Jacob Manuel Obama Bush says he will run for second term as US President in 2032.

Private company US Postal Services raises price of stamps to $28 and reduces mail delivery to Wednesdays only.

After a ten year $175.8 billion study, commissioned by the Democrats, scientists prove diet and exercise is the key to weight loss and good health.

Average weight of the American male drops to 252 lbs.

Supreme Court rules punishment of criminals violates their civil and human rights. Victims must also be held responsible for crimes.

Average height of professional basketball players is now nine feet, seven inches.

New Homeland Security law requires that all nail clippers, screwdrivers, fly swatters and rolled-up newspapers must be registered by January 2035 as lethal weapons.

The IRS lowers the tax rate to 75 per cent.






...

2 comments:

Sunny said...

OH GEE, LOL, ROFLMBO!

Chimp said...

Hi Sunny!!! Glad I can make you LOL and ROFLMBO! Have a great day!